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Love with No Where to Go

Published: January 17, 2022 by Lanny Funchess

When dealing with our grief or the grief of another, it helps us to understand what is happening in the midst of a loss. One definition that is intriguing is that grief is, “Love with no outlet.” In other words, when a person loses someone who they genuinely love, their love has lost its tangible object. The loss of a loved one brings a void or emptiness that seems impossible to be filled by another. 

Deep love is not a one-way street. It involves two people who are committed to each other, and their lives become intertwined. People who truly love each other eventually become one in thought and desire. It could be the love between a married couple, a parent and a child, grandparent and grandchild, siblings or close friends. Their souls have become attached. When death separates the one from the other, the survivor enters into a world of disassociation. Their love has no where to go. 

It is tempting for the grieving person to escape into a world of memories and try to mentally recreate the former relationship. When this happens, they get stuck in the past. Instead of retreating into an unhealthy life of unfulfilled love, a grieving person must find another outlet for their love. That is why journaling or joining a grief support group is emotionally beneficial. A grieving person must learn to refocus their love and at the same time not put impossible expectations on others. It may be difficult, but they must find new avenues to express their love.

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